Become less intimidating

Posted by / 05-Dec-2017 20:58

Whenever you find yourself in this position where you are interacting with a guy, keep telling yourself to be patient and hear him out.

Yes, that means that you try paying attention to him and stay quiet.

Let’s assume that you believe that guys are intimidated by you due to your attitude.

Perhaps you believe that you are too brazen or standoffish.

Ask yourself about what you tend to do when guys are around.

Actually give him the opportunity to talk and express his opinions.

Evaluate their skills vs the difficulty of the tasks - are they capable?

Because of this approach, I probably come across as very harsh and I think the team is afraid to communicate with me.

Your problem is that the work is not completed - there is a subtle difference between that and no delivery. If you've been micromanaging, it would be a good thing to mention as not working - they're enjoying it about as much as you are (not) and obviously, its not working. You give up the micromanagement, they give up the slackness. Its very possible they may have good suggestions to incorporate. In 3 weeks, start one-on-ones if you haven't already (schedule them now).

First step - a team meeting where you lay this all out. A lot of what I described, I only recognized in retrospect.

If they still don't get the message, move toward getting them out of there; now they're in trouble. It was a wake up call to the rest of us that wanted to be successful, but had drifted to a weaker standard - the broken window theory is definitely at work here.

Bottom line - someone who won't deliver doesn't belong in a project based organization. There should be public notice of the standard of delivery.

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